As much as we talk about not judging other moms, it can pretty difficult to stop.
We make decisions about what is best for our children and don’t always understand why someone would choose to do the opposite. Some of the choices are taken out of our hands, of course. Whether a mom is financially able to stay at home or physically able to breastfeed. It’s not necessarily a choice that the mom would make if she didn’t have to, but she’ll be judged for the result anyway.
I had a friend a few years ago that I think of whenever I talk about the Mommy Wars.
We each had two small children and were part of a playgroup in my small town. We brought all of the kids together several times each week to play, and once a month, the moms would all go out for a “Mom’s Night Out”.
I enjoyed this one woman’s company very much and thought that we were becoming great friends until one night, the conversation turned to working moms vs. stay-at-home moms. After a few of her comments about how I did nothing all day long and joking about how I can’t keep the house clean with all day long to clean it, I’ll admit, I got a little defensive.
I came back with a few comments of my own about how she can afford a maid since they have 2 incomes and how her house stays clean because no one is in it all day.
It was silly. We were both getting defensive about our own choices when we didn’t need to be. We both were perfectly happy with our decisions and our children were happy, healthy and well-cared for.
There was no need for judgement. No need for being self-conscious about our decisions. We all want the very best for our babies, and that can include a lot of different things for different families.
I want you to take a look at this short #EndMommyWars film. It really shows how judging affects women from both sides and has a beautiful message about mothers’ choices.
How touching was that?! It was so powerful to hear other mothers share how they feel when they’re judged and admit that they sometimes judge others themselves.
Let’s all be more intentional about support each other’s choices to help #EndMommyWars! Share your thoughts about the video at endmommywars.com.
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