Last week at a twitter party online, women were sharing their embarrassing stories about getting their periods when they were younger. Some of the stories were funny, some were not, but they all reminded me of just what it was like during that awkward phase of my life. I’m determined that my daughter doesn’t end up with embarrassing stories about her first period. I want her to feel comfortable talking to me about it and comfortable with the changes her bodies will go through.
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I like to be (age-appropriate) open with my kids about puberty and have started talking to my older daughter a little about her first period. She’s almost 8, which seems to still be very young for discussions of puberty. But because of her very tall height and the fact that she hit other developmental milestones so early, her Pediatrician has said he wouldn’t be surprised if my daughter got her period before all of her friends. It’s actually not as uncommon as one might think for girls to get their periods in their tweens now, so I want to be sure we’re prepared.
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This is one of the ways we’re doing it:
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It looks pretty innocuous, right? Just a make-up bag a girl might keep in her backpack. But we’ve packed it for my daughter with lots of great stuff to help her feel prepared for her first period.
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The bag was a great way to start a conversation with my daughter about how she’ll take care of herself during her period. It’s packed with lots of fun, girly stuff like a compact hair brush, hair accessories, jewelry, bright color bandages, a nail file and a couple of fun, bright-colored liners.
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While we were deciding what else to add to my daughter’s bag, we talked about the liners. We’ve talked in the past about what will happen to her body, but showing her the cute little brightly-packaged pads and liners was something new. I opened some and showed my daughter what they were like so she’d be familiar with them. She’s thrilled to have her own little cosmetics bag down in her backpack and now she has liners that she’ll know how to use if she gets her first period at school.
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Since getting her period when she’s away from home might still be an upsetting or stressful event, there are a few other things we’re doing to help her feel more comfortable about it happening.
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Tips for Talking About Her First Period
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Code word ~
This is one of my very favorite ideas I’ve read about planning for my daughter’s first period. We have a code word that only we know. If she’s at school or at a sleepover and gets her first period, she can call me and easily work the code word into the conversation. I will ask if she would like for me to come get her and will make sure she’s OK. She likes the idea of being able to tell me without other people knowing her personal business, so I think it’s a wonderful idea.
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Experimenting with Products ~
When we were packing up my daughter’s new cosmetics bag, I got out several extra pads and liners for us to play with. We pulled them apart, dipped them in water and talked about how they work. I liked that my daughter could see how they work but also see how comfortable we can be talking about them. It’s my hope that she’ll feel the same way when the time comes.
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A Mom-Daughter Spa Day ~
As we talked about my daughter getting her period in the future, I made sure to talk about some fun things that come along with growing into a (very) young lady too. I told her that since she’s getting old enough now, we can plan a Mom-Daughter Spa Day soon for just the two of us. We’ll paint our nails and fix each other’s hair and have some quality girl time. I want it to be a laid-back time where she can ask any questions or tell me anything that’s on her mind, so I let her know it’s just for us – girl time!
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If you’ve wondered about how to talk to your tween or teen about her first period, there are a lot of really great tips and ideas on the Kotex website. There’s also a really cool page set up just for the girls, with lots of answers to their questions, stories from other girls just like them, and even common myths about periods with the actual facts.
I wrote this review while participating in a Brand Ambassador Campaign by Mom Central Consulting on behalf of U by Kotex Tween and received products to facilitate my post and a promotional item to thank me for taking the time to participate.
Linda S says
The most important tip I have goes to the parent(s): We’ve been living with our periods for generations. (Age-appropriate) honesty is a necessity! And whatever you do – don’t wait to have this talk. Girls as young as 7 and 8 are starting their periods. Make sure you keep track of your child’s development. Talk to your pediatrician. I noticed my little girl beginning to develop. Her doctor decided we needed to see a Endocrinologist. He checked for a condition known as Precocious Puberty. Besides psychological issues with starting puberty before their peers, there are physical aspects to be aware of as well. Precocious Puberty can be caused by food hormones, genetics and/or a tumor near the pituitary gland. So, please talk to your pediatrician. And my last thought: hug and love your daughter!!!
kristin says
I really like the way you wrote this story and review. It was helpful too. I had this on my mind to do soon. Thanks!