Spring Cleaning for the Cleaning-Challenged

Ah, spring cleaning!

It’s the perfect time of year to throw open the windows and spend a week cleaning. Get everything in the house sparkling and smelling fresh, right?

But what if the cats or dogs or kids will jump out the window if you open it? What if you can’t spend a week deep-cleaning everything in sight because you work outside the home? Or work inside the home? And/or have children that you’re taking care of and cooking for and entertaining and teaching and carpooling and raising?

That’s my problem. Spring cleaning for me isn’t what it is for my next door neighbor, Mrs. PerfectLady.

So I thought I’d take a moment to critique her Spring Cleaning List and then share mine. For all of you moms who are keeping it real out there.

Mrs. PerfectLady’s Spring Cleaning List

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1. Clean carpets and upholstery – move furniture and shampoo all of the carpets. (My thought: This one starts off just fine. It makes sense to clean the carpet and upholstery from time to time. But I draw the line at moving furniture. The carpet under the furniture is the cleanest carpet I own. No need to get all fancy with couch-moving so I can clean it more.)
2. Clean Your Curtains – Remove all curtains and draperies, then wash or dry-clean according to product instructions. (My thought: One of the many ways that ADHD rocks – I never actually hung them in the first place. They’re still in the packages up the attic, clean as can be. Score!)
3. Clean all Shelving – Remove books from bookshelves, deorative items from shelves and electronic equipment from entertainment center, then clean. (My thought: Since I consider us lucky to have successfully connected 87 different tech products together the first time, they’re not moving an inch. I’ll run a feather duster over the top of everything and call this one “done”.)
4. Take Care of Your Stainless Steel – To keep your stainless steel bright and clean, use a light mist of wax-based aerosol spray to polish your stainless steel. Continue this once or twice a week throughout the year. (My thought: If my pots are clean inside and the bottoms don’t catch on fire when I cook, I feel like we’re good here.)
5. Organizing Closets – Get rid of unused clothes and accessories, then sort the rest by how you dress in the morning and by color. (My thought: Since I may or may not be a candidate for Hoarders in the future, I’m going to admit that this would never happen. You KNOW those size 8s (and 10s and some 12s) will fit again someday, so I’m gonna hang onto those for when I lose that weight.)
6. Check your coils – clean your refrigerator’s condenser coil with a long handled brush or move your refrigerator out a few feet and vacuum thoroughly behind it. (My thought: Um, yeah. I’m gonna go with a “no” on that. Can’t see it, smell it or hear it, so it’s just fine.)
7. Dust Lightbulbs – Mrs. PerfectLady switched her light and lamp bulbs over to $8,500 worth of Led, CFL and XYZ bulbs that will last for year. (My thought: Mine are cheap, burn out and have to be replaced every few weeks, so I have need to dust light bubs. I win!)
8. Restock Homekeeping Supplies – Spring is a great time to replenish all of your cleaning supplies. (My thought: Coolest thing ever – my stores are open year-round! I’ve been buying supplies all year. I’m ahead of the game on this one. Woot!)

Isn’t it crazy how much time Mrs. PerfectLady is wasting on her home? Think of all the time she could be spending out on the sidewalk gossiping instead of crazy-cleaning!

In an effort to help all of you who are doing the best you can, here’s a much more appropriate Spring Cleaning To-Do list:

Spring Cleaning for the Cleaning-Challenged

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1. Clean Your Windows – Do it. It’s easy and makes a noticeable difference. Your neighbors will notice and talk about you if you don’t.
2. Wash Your Blinds – They’re nasty. Take some time to vacuum your blinds and then wipe them down with a clean, damp cloth. (You and I both know we’ll need 16 cloths before we’re finished.)
3. Update Bed Linens – I hope you’ve been washing your linens regularly like you should. If you have, they’re probably worn and need to be replaced. If you haven’t, they’re nasty. Burn them, then throw them away, then burn them again. Either way, get nice fresh linens as a reward for cleaning your house.
4. Wash and Wax Hardwood Floors – Scrape up the dried-on-cheerios with a metal spatula and spray cleaner on all of those sticky, dark or mysterious spots on your wood floors. Let it sit for a while. When you remember that you forgot to go back and clean it, spray again and set a timer for 15 minutes. Once the spray has loosened the dirt, mop or steam clean well.
5. Clean Out the Refrigerator – You know it’s all expired anyway. Get a huge trash can and toss everything into the can. Spray the fridge shelves and drawers and scrub them until they look like Mrs. PerfectLady’s fridge. Then re-stock with fresh foods and condiments.
6. Deep-Clean Carpets and Rugs – Deep clean if you have a cleaner or can afford to rent or hire one. If not, vacuum thoroughly and take the time to spot clean those places you’ve been meaning to get to all year.
7. Organize Your Closet – Donate or sell the stuff you don’t like. Put your favorite items in the front and cram everything else really far into the back. If you need more room, take out more ugly stuff. You know you haven’t worth those things in 10 years.
8. Clean ceiling fixtures – Your ceiling fans are nasty. Turning the fans on so no one can tell is not cleaning. Climb up on a ladder and really dust then wipe the fan blades with a damp cloth. Do the same for chandeliers and other ceiling fixtures.
9. Do Everything Else – Wash or clean walls, cabinets, baseboards, woodwork and all of the other places you’ve been neglecting all year. You’ll probably never get to this task anyway, so well just consider this one optional.

You’re done! Your house is now a hundred times cleaner than it has been in years and you deserve a reward. Treat yourself to a fancy dinner with the hubs, a night out dancing with the girls or just a long bubble bath with a good book.

I’ll be rewarding myself with the best Spring Cleaning reward EVER – a brand new mattress from Nature’s Sleep! Wooohoooo!

I don’t think I’ve ever been so excited about a new product for the home! I have had horrible sleep problems for years and can’t wait to sleep on an awesome new Nature’s Sleep memory foam mattress.

I’ll be sharing my experience receiving, setting up and using my brand new Nature’s Sleep mattress soon, so be sure to stay tuned!

Want to reward yourself with a better night’s sleep? Learn more about Nature’s Sleep mattresses and products.

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